How Things Are
by CaseyBensonNovak
Summary: Co-Author for Eva-Mizuki-Levaris. Casey, and Olivia are just falling into a groove with their secret romance, but can one tragedy tear them apart forever? Will Casey survive?
1. Chapter 1

A month had passed since the night Casey and Olivia took their relationship one step further. After having a few Friday night drinks with the rest of the squad, they had stayed behind, engrossed in conversation. One thing had led to another and they had ended up discussing what they looked for in a relationship. It was then that they realized they wanted all the same things, and before they knew it, they were confessing their feelings for each other.

They had gone back to Olivia's apartment and spent the night cuddling, talking, kissing, and doing whatever they pleased together. It had been around four in the morning when they finally fell asleep.

Casey pulled out of her memories and glanced down at the stack of paperwork on her desk. She sighed and picked up her pen just as someone knocked on the door. "The door is open Detective," she called, recognizing Olivia Benson's signature knock. Nobody knew they were together, since their jobs forbade it. So in the hallway of the office, at the precinct, and at the courthouse, they hid their romantic relationship with a strictly professional one.

Olivia opened the door and closed it gently. Her hair was down, which was just the way Casey liked it. She was still wearing her suit from court that morning. It fit her in all the right places; Casey resisted the urge to pounce on her. "Case?" Olivia's voice sounded worried.

"Huh?" Casey blinked a few times. "Sorry babe."

"Were you daydreaming again?" Olivia asked as she folded her arms across her chest and gave Casey the look that was usually reserved for perpetrators she believed to be lying.

Casey nodded, ashamed. "I have been spacing out all day. During the trial this morning, I couldn't help but think how much I wanted you. Before you knocked on the door, I was caught up in a memory of our first night together." She moved her paperwork aside as Olivia sat down on the edge of the desk. As she gazed into the beautiful brunette's alluring chocolate brown eyes, Casey wondered yet again why Olivia wanted **her, **out of all of the other women in the world.

"I think about that night all the time," Olivia replied. "I also think about all of our other nights together. I think about you Case." She smiled softly and paused for a moment before continuing. "Anyway, I came here to see if I can pry a certain beautiful ADA away from her work long enough for a lunch date."

Casey pretended to be deep in thought about Olivia's offer, when in reality, she wanted to jump up and down and say yes a million times. That wouldn't be very professional or ladylike. "Sure Detective," she finally answered. "Where are we going?"

"A cute French café a few blocks from here. I know you love French food, and I have a craving for croissants right now."

"How is it that you eat so much, yet you stay so damn thin?" Casey asked as she grabbed her sweater from the sofa. She was used to the fact that Olivia had a bottomless pit for a stomach.

Olivia's reply was simple. "An hour of sex burns one hundred fifty calories. Therefore, I have you to thank for keeping me so thin." She smirked and walked out of the office.

"That, and all the weight goes to your boobs," Casey muttered before locking the door and following Olivia to her car. Traffic wasn't as bad as usual, so it only took about half the time to get to the café. They picked out a table near the window and waited to be served.

"You said this morning that you were going to make a deal with the Thomas kid. What made you change your mind?"

"The last time I saw him was at his competence hearing. He was…" Casey trailed off. "You can't fake being schizophrenic, and you especially can't be as convincing as he was. I know what it is like to deal with a schizophrenic, and it's not easy. I can't put someone like him in jail; he needs help. I'm going to offer him a deal: time served in a mental health ward in exchange for a nullified prison sentence. I have to help him Olivia," she added, more to herself than Olivia.

Olivia smiled and nodded as a server delivered a basket of croissants to the table. She took one and bit into it, sighing. "Elliot and I can't agree on-" Her phone beeped. She answered it with an apologetic shrug. "Benson." After a few moments, she said "I'll be right there," and hung up.

"You're leaving?" Casey asked in disbelief.

"I have to. I'm sorry."

"I love you," Casey murmured as Olivia walked out. What the hell could be so important?


	2. Chapter 2

Olivia had been called out to a scene. She wondered why it was so urgent. They had also told her that she'd been requested specially. Their word dripped off their tongues like a poison, and it made her a bit uneasy. She was, admittedly, an astounding detective, but to be specially requested at a crime scene wasn't particularly normal.

"Detective Benson?" A short and pudgy whose dark gray hair seemed to be balding NYPD officer stepped up to shake her hand in a forced politeness. It struck her as odd that he was so openly dissatisfied with being polite to her, but she brushed it off. Police work wasn't easy; he may have been stressed.

"Officer." She nodded at him, and held out her hand for the report. "What do we have?" She was all business, even if Casey was still fresh in her mind.

"It's a rape case, obviously. Ten year old girl found raped and murdered in her apartment home." A typical case of rape, but she was so young. The officer continued. "The semen we found matches an unlikely source." Olivia nodded and handed back the report.

"Let's go in." She didn't ask who the perpetrator was, because she wanted to see what he'd done first, but that was her biggest mistake.

As she stepped into the room, Olivia almost lurched at the smell. A small girl sat tied to a computer chair. Her small legs still hadn't lost all the pudge of a child, and her face was as round and soft as a porcelain doll. Her legs were tied to the bottom of the wheels, and the moving of the chair had broken both ankles post-mortem. Her arms were tied to the chair and her undeveloped breasts were exposed, and cut open in a "Y" incision, the way you do in autopsies to expose every organ and hanging piece of flesh. All this was horrible, but the worst of it was her eyes. She had strikingly gorgeous green eyes, and they were open, staring in mock accusation. Staring right at Olivia, screaming in her mind. How could you let this happen? How could you?

Olivia just stared into her eyes, her glossy green eyes. Those eyes became burned in her memory like they were her own. As she stared at the child the officer pulled her away; he had been talking, but she didn't hear a word.

"Who?" she asked lowly, coming out of her trance.

"Excuse me?" The officer still seemed to distrust the detective, as if SHE had really done the crime.

"Who did it?" she asked a bit louder. Then she screamed. "Who could have done that?"

"Detective Elliot Stabler." Olivia's world crashed around her.

Stabler? There was no way he would ever… "There has to be some mistake, Officer-"

"It wasn't a mistake."


	3. Chapter 3

After leaving the café, Casey went back to the office and ordered beef chow mein from her favorite Chinese restaurant. Once her paperwork was finished, she took her lunch and the rest of her things home. As she unlocked the front door of her apartment, she sighed. "Thanks Olivia. That date was wonderful," she murmured to herself.

As she hung her car keys on their hook and laid her briefcase on the table, she fought back tears. She felt stupid for thinking the lunch date would actually happen this time. Sighing again, Casey curled up on the couch under a blanket as she silently ate her chow mein with a pair of special chopsticks she had bought a few years back. By the time she retrieved the fortune cookie from the carton, the tears were falling freely. Olivia had been acting really strange towards her. She had been cold and snippy, but Casey couldn't figure out what she had done wrong.

She opened her fortune cookie, unfolded the tiny piece of paper, and read her fortune. "Things are not what they seem," the paper said. Casey shook her head and turned to face the back of the couch, then cried herself to sleep.

A knock on the door startled her awake. "It's open babe," she called, wondering if Olivia had even heard her. Maybe everything would be better now.

Olivia opened the door and, without even saying hello, went straight to the refrigerator. She glared inside, then slammed the refrigerator doors shut. "You're out of beer," she snapped.

"I don't drink beer," Casey responded, raising an eyebrow in confusion. Clearly Olivia was pissed about something; she only drank beer when she was really angry. "What's wrong with you?"

"Nothing."

Casey sighed and narrowed her eyes as she watched Olivia once again open the refrigerator. "Really? You're looking for nonexistent beer; you know I don't have any. You're giving me short, cold answers. You're slamming doors, storming around, and quite frankly, you're being a bitch. Don't lie to me and tell me nothing is wrong."

Olivia paused, holding a knife poised just above the mayonnaise jar. "It's work," she replied before spreading mayonnaise on four slices of bread.

"I figured that much. I'm going to assume it has something to do with why you left the café earlier. Why won't you talk to me?"

"Because it doesn't concern you! You wouldn't-" Olivia stopped herself, but Casey knew what she was going to say.

She looked at Olivia and slowly sat back down on the couch. "I wouldn't understand? Why do you say that Olivia? How can you say that? Is it because I'm not a cop?" She once more turned to face the back of the couch. "Or is it because I'm not Elliot?"

"It's just not something you're used to. I-"

Casey cut her off. "Not used to?" she repeated. "I've been working with the Special Victims Unit since 2003. In case you've forgotten, I have seen and been through a lot. I may not be out there in the field making collars and chasing perpetrators, but I still know what goes on in the cases. You are being elusive and cryptic."

"Hopefully I'll be better once the case is over," Olivia responded as she finished making her sandwiches and bit into one of them.

"It isn't just this case Olivia. You've been this way for a couple of weeks and I have no idea why, because you won't talk to me." Olivia sighed loudly. She set her sandwich on the plate and leaned against the counter. "Work has been stressful. I think…I think it would be best if we took a break."

"From work?"

Olivia shook her head. "No. From us. I'm sorry." She stood up and gently kissed Casey's cheek, then left, closing the door behind her.

Casey felt the hot tears spill out of her eyes yet again. Within seconds, she was crying harder than she had in a long time, for no reason, yet for every reason. She didn't know what she had done to make Olivia want a break from her, but she knew one thing: she was going to find out.


	4. Chapter 4

Olivia was glad to be out of court, and next to her one saving grace, Casey. She didn't know how to strike up a conversation though, and her mind was still reeling from the crime her partner had committed. They hadn't caught Elliot yet, but she was going to have to be heavily involved in the trial when they did.

Casey wondered what had caused her love to have such a bipolar couple of days, and no matter how glad she was to get her back, she was still heartbroken enough not to open up to her again.

Fore these reasons the two walked in silence to one of their favorite hole in the wall cafes. Halfway through her second cup of coffee, Olivia just had to break the silence, so she set her cup down and looked at Casey in the eyes. "Okay, I was wrong, and I'm sorry. There was this really bad case and-" She started.

"A bad case?" Casey repeated. "That's what caused you to break my heart? Do you know how many bad cases I get every day? That's a horrible excuse." Casey was angry already, and her hurt was taking over.

"I'm sorry…" Olivia decided not to tell her as she looked down at the cup in her hands.

"Sorry I got angry…" Casey sighed. "I love you Olivia." She placed her hand over the detective's, who was still staring at the black liquid.

Olivia's thoughts were swirling about the monster she was and the monster she could have become. "I…I love you too," she whispered before paying the check. "It's late. We should get home."

"Okay," Casey agreed before sneaking a quick kiss. Then she left, still hurt, but hoping for the best.

Olivia headed to the Liquor Barn.


	5. Chapter 5

Casey went straight home from the café. She was exhausted and sore and frustrated. She loved Olivia with all her heart, and she loved that they were together. But a part of her nagged "It's only a matter of time before she does it again." How long would it be before Olivia flaked out again? Casey wasn't the type of girl who handled rejection well, and getting back together six million and one times was not her thing. She needed a stable relationship with someone who truly loved her, not someone who said they loved her in bed and then left in the morning.

Even before their relationship reached dating point, Casey had known about Olivia's past, and she accepted her for that and didn't judge her. As far as work went, both women knew how important work was to the other. Casey knew right from the start that Olivia would have to juggle spending time with her and working, and she could handle that. What she could not and would not deal with was being with Olivia if she was going to keep leaving, and if it came down to it, Casey would tell her that, because she deserved to know. Not only that, but Casey believed relationships were built on love and honesty.

After a couple hours of watching mindless TV shows, Casey drifted into an uneasy sleep that didn't last more than a few hours, because her dreams were plagued with nightmares of Charlie. She awoke with a start and noted by the clock above the television that it was just after eight in the evening. She had told Olivia about Charlie on more than one occasion, but what she was too afraid to admit was the fact that for the last few months, her dreams had been haunted by the man who had once been the center of her universe. This was partially because she was terrified that the brunette would react negatively and partially because Casey hoped that if she stayed quiet, the nightmares would disappear again.

Her phone beeped twice from the coffee table, indicating she had a new voicemail. Grabbing the phone, she called her voicemail and listened to her missed messages. Two were from the victim in on of her more prominent cases. The third was from Olivia. Casey listened to it first.

"Hey beautiful," came Olivia's voice. "I hope you went home after lunch. You need to relax sometimes. How was the rest of your day? Call me when you get this. I love you. Bye."

Casey hung up and sighed. Olivia sounded drunk. She wasn't sure what annoyed her more, the fact that Olivia expected her to go home while she went out and had God knows how many drinks, or the fact that she had the audacity to sound as if nothing had happened to them. After contemplating what to do next, Casey turned her phone off, slipped it into her purse and grabbed her keys. Then she left her apartment and drove to Olivia's apartment. It was time to figure out what the hell was going on between them once and for all.


	6. Chapter 6

Olivia had bought three bottles of some cheap Black Velvet, and gone home to have a ball forgetting the real world. As she drank, she thought of Casey, and of Elliot. Maybe she should tell Casey that maybe Elliot was framed. Maybe she should have another drink.

Halfway through her second bottle Olivia's mind screamed everything to do with Casey; her gorgeous smile, her silky soft hair, her gorgeous eyes, and her smooth voice. She hoped that the girl relaxed; she had seemed so uptight at the restaurant. So she called her. Drunk dialing was a bad idea.

"Hey beautiful," she spoke as clearly as possible. "I hope you went home after lunch. You need to relax sometimes. How was the rest of your day? Call me when you get this. Love you. Bye." She had gotten the machine, so she was only able to embarrass herself a bit.

"Caseyyyyyyy" she called to the air. "Come overrrrr…" After that Olivia found herself sprawled haphazardly on the couch.

Not knowing how long her lover had been passed out, Casey entered the house and sighed. Olivia was laying half on her couch and half on her coffee table, one completely empty bottle of cheap whiskey on the floor. Olivia should have more class than this. She began picking up.

After finishing making the apartment look presentable, Casey moved to cover up her soon to be sick girlfriend, but something stopped her. Olivia was sweating and thrashing in her sleep, hot tears rolling down her face. What had brought the woman to this? She wanted to hold her, and help her through this. Casey knew she shouldn't because she was the one hurt by all of this, she was the one whose heart ached, but she had to help the woman she loved. With the utmost amount of love and stealth, she put the woman's head on her lap, stroking her hair.

"Olivia…I love you," she whispered, almost to herself. "What has happened to you?" She kissed her forehead gently, but the nightmare wouldn't stop. Olivia was throwing her arms around know, kicking too. Casey was getting worried, but before she could move to safety, it all ended with a loud scream. Olivia shot up and turned quickly, staring wild eyed at Casey before she realized where she was.

"Casey…" Olivia hugged her tightly, a million emotions flowing out of her at once, but before she could say anything else, she ran to the bathroom as the stinging cheap liquor reappeared.


	7. Chapter 7

As Olivia rushed to the bathroom, Casey's attention was caught by a black corner peeking out from underneath the blanket that had previously been on top of the detective's body only moments before. Intrigued, she grabbed it, knowing immediately that it was a case file. As she opened it, she realized to her chagrin that it was Stabler's case file.

Casey wasn't a nosy person, and she hated to betray Olivia's trust, but the only thought running through her mind at the moment was one of what the hell was this doing there? Sighing, she scanned through it, along with Olivia's handwritten notes in the margins. It did not take long for her to comprehend the gist of what was going on.

"I'm sorry about that Case. Thanks for coming over."

Casey stood up, ignoring that comment.

"You seem mad. Why are you mad?"

"Why am I mad?" Casey repeated. "Are you so drunk that you have no common sense? You have to ask me why I'm mad? Gee, let me think about that one. I get a call from the woman I love and I know she's drunk. Oh, let's backtrack for a moment, shall we? My girlfriend, the love of my life, decided to take her anger towards her partner out on ME. NOW I get a call from that same girlfriend asking me to come over. I get here and she's fucking drunk off her ass. And to add to that," Casey added as she picked up the black folder on the table. "I find this! Did you forget how to read too or are you capable of seeing what you wrote?"

Olivia reached for the folder, but Casey gave her a death glare and she backed off. "I-I understand that you're angry and probably hurt, but he-he's innocent Casey."

"HE'S NOT INNOCENT! He's guilty and the sooner you accept that, the better everyone's lives will be. Why are you fighting me on this Olivia?" Casey shook her head and bit her lip until she tasted blood, willing herself not to cry. But her emotions got the better of her and hot tears began falling from her emerald green eyes.

Olivia sighed. "Can't you at least give him the benefit of the doubt? He's my partner Casey. I have known him for twelve years, and I trust him. Please baby…give him a chance."

"Fine," Casey agreed begrudgingly. "But if he is proven guilty, I'm taking his ass to trial."

"Deal."

"You know…" Casey thought for a moment. "We have a date planned for tonight…let's just stay in and order Chinese. We have a lot to talk about."

Olivia sat on the couch. Casey sat next to her, knowing that the brunette was slowly become sober again. Once some food was in her bottomless pit of a stomach, she would be as good as new. Well, hopefully.


	8. Chapter 8

Olivia ordered two extra large pizzas. One was 'the works' and the other was double pepperoni, because she knew Casey would only eat pepperoni or plain cheese pizza. In addition, she ordered chow mein from Casey's favorite restaurant. The two women sat on the couch, silently, and not even looking at each other. Olivia sighed as she realized Casey had stopped eating. She glanced down at Casey's pizza. "You've only taken a couple of mouse sized bites," she observed.

"Yeah," Casey murmured. She exhaled slowly and stared out the living room window. "I'm not as hungry as I thought."

"I know you're mad at me," Olivia responded, setting her takeout container on the coffee table and looking at the back of Casey's hair. The soft, beautiful hair she was starting to worry she would never be allowed to run her fingers through again. "He's my partner Casey. What did you expect me to do?"

Casey shook her head in disbelief. "Justice has a nice ring to it."

"We agreed that if he's proven guilty-"

Casey turned around as her green eyes, dark with an emotion Olivia couldn't place, met Olivia's chocolate brown ones. "If?" she repeated. "Motive, means, opportunity, DNA.." She counted the evidence with her fingers as she spoke. "I'm just as shocked by this bullshit as you are. EVERYBODY is. Elliot Stabler is the last person one would expect to do this, but his credibility went out the window when his DNA turned up! It's my job to prosecute him, and I am going to do my job. Stop standing in my way."

"You are being a fucking bitch about this."

Casey stood up, and in the process knocked her soda over. It fell to the floor and spilled out of the cup. She stormed into the kitchen and grabbed a washcloth. Moments later, she returned to the living room and began scrubbing the carpet. "Need we review what was in the folder?" Casey grabbed the folder and opened it, then pointed to certain sections as she talked. "I need to call a defense attorney in the morning," she recited. Sliding her finger to the next lines of Olivia's handwriting, she continued. By the time she was finished, Olivia was staring at her in shock.

"HE IS MY PARTNER, MY FRIEND, THE LONGEST RELATIONSHIP I HAVE EVER HAD WITH A MAN IN MY ENTIRE LIFE!" Olivia shouted, glaring down at Casey. This could not be happening. Casey was always about justice, and one of the few times Olivia needed her, Casey just didn't care.

It was Casey's turn to speak up. "DON'T YOU THINK I KNOW THAT? YOU ARE MISSING THE ENTIRE FUCKING POINT OF THIS. THERE IS A MOUND OF EVIDENCE AGAINST HIM AND YOU STILL THINK HE'S INNOCENT AND THEN YOU HAVE THE NERVE TO WRITE IN THIS CASE FILE THAT, QUOTE 'CASEY WILL NEVER UNDERSTAND HOW I FEEL'?" Casey grabbed her purse and walked over to the doorway. "Call me when you decide you love me enough to try to step into my shoes."

"Casey, wait-" Olivia tried to protest as Casey yanked open the front door. "Don't leave." Olivia hated how pathetic she sounded, but she loved Casey more than anything and this was too painful, even for Detective Olivia Benson.

Casey shook her head. "I can't wait anymore," she replied quietly. "I can't turn around when you call me back, because it's just a matter of time before it happens again." She started out again, then paused and looked back. "And for the record, I had them re test the DNA because I thought he was innocent too. He's not, and I'm sorry, but you just have to accept that."

As the door closed, Olivia stood paralyzed, staring blankly at the doorway. She bit back tears and curled up on the couch, closing her eyes with the hope that some way, somehow, this was a horrible nightmare brought on by her lack of sleep. Realizing it wasn't, she reached for a half empty of vodka sitting on the coffee table and downed it in a single gulp.


	9. Chapter 9

Casey stared out her bedroom window as soft tears fell from her eyes and down her cheeks. She didn't know what to think anymore. Her mind was a mass jumble of confusion, a labyrinth in which every turn led her to a wall. She understood the fact that Olivia wanted Elliot to be innocent, because he was her partner and comrade. But what she could not and did not understand was how Olivia could obstruct justice and not feel the least bit guilty. Where was the Olivia Benson Casey had fallen madly in love with?

Sighing, Casey rolled onto her other side so she was no longer facing the window, which looked like a portal into endless depression in her current state of mind. It took four more hours, but eventually she settled into a rough and broken sleep, plagued with nightmares and horrible outcomes. She woke up crying in the middle of the night, and sat up in bed, realizing she was panting. Starting out as a fantasy, the dream had been joyful, lovable, sweet, but then it had ended with Olivia telling her she never wanted to see her again, she hated her, she was only with her because she felt sorry for her. Casey turned the bedroom light on and propped herself up, trying to convince herself it was only a dream, just a nightmare. But, on the other hand, what if Olivia actually thought those things about her? That was a nightmare in itself!

Casey rubbed her eyes and attempted to regulate her breathing by breathing in deeply and letting it out slowly, then again, and again, before she realized it wasn't helping at all. She started to reach for the phone, but stopped herself. What if Olivia didn't answer? What if she answered and said the things in the dream? What if she broke up with her? Scenarios flew through Casey's head so quickly it gave her a migraine. Sighing, she retrieved a law book from the bookshelf in the corner and once more propped herself up in bed. She flipped to a page she had pasted a sticky note onto and began reading. After three hours, she closed it in frustration. "Nothing," she said to herself. There was nothing in there that could help her with Stabler's case. She was torn between a rock and a hard place. She could prosecute Elliot and risk losing Olivia, or she could give Elliot a deal and risk being labeled public hatred number one. In essence, it was her job and reputation or the woman she loved, and Casey found her mind more jumbled than a one thousand piece puzzle.

Feeling screwed, Casey reached for the phone and dialed a number she was surprised she remembered. A sleepy voice answered from the other end. "ADA Alexandra Cabot." Casey looked at the clock. It was just after three. She sighed before speaking.

"Alex?"

"Casey? You're up late. Is everything okay?"

Casey shook her head, then felt foolish when she remembered the other woman couldn't see her. "No, everything is not okay." She paused, then continued. "You know about the case with Elliot, right? Olivia always talks about how innocent he has to be, contrary to what the mound of evidence says, and she deliberately erased a lot of his file to make it look like he was innocent. I have a difficult decision to make that involves a risky choice and a risky choice. If I prosecute him, I'm afraid that Olivia will hate me, but if I give him a deal…the public will hate me." The line was silent. "Alex?"

"I'm here, I didn't hang up." Alex sighed. "You weren't kidding, you're screwed either way. Here's what you should do. Call Olivia and talk to her. Tell her how you feel, and how you're hurt by this too. Relationships are built on communication. You both need to talk to each other."

Casey decided not to share her nightmare. Instead, she replied "Thank you for the help. Sorry I woke you. Good night-or, more accurately, good morning. Bye," she added before hanging up. She decided to take Alex's advice, but instead of calling Olivia, she would go over. She pulled on a sweater and exited the bedroom. Making her way to the front door, Casey unlatched the chain and opened the door, then almost fainted. Standing in her doorway was the very same person she had just been thinking about. Olivia offered a small smile and Casey wordlessly let her in, closing the door behind her. The two just looked at each other for several moments.


	10. Chapter 10

Casey stood there staring at the woman in front of her, and received the same treatment in return. Neither of them spoke. In reality, only a few seconds passed, but it felt like an eternity to Casey. Finally, she wordlessly stepped aside and allowed Olivia into her apartment. She leaned against the wall and sighed. "I don't want to fight anymore," she said quietly. "It's tearing us apart! We agreed that-"

Olivia cut her off. "We agreed the night we got together that even though certain cases would affect us, we would never let it come between our feelings for each other. I know. And as much as I want to say this is different…" She exhaled slowly, then looked into Casey's eyes. "It's different in some ways but very much the same as the cases we made that promise for in many others. I'm sorry for hurting you and being such a bitch to you."

"I'm sorry for coming across like I don't care about the fact that he's in jail and facing serious charges." Casey walked over to the couch and curled her legs underneath her. "It's not easy knowing a majority of the people who see you two working together think there is an attraction and that you're sleeping together. Who knows what else they think? Almost everybody thinks it, Olivia, and I just-it hurts."

Olivia walked to the couch and sat down next to the attorney. "I know it does. Believe me, every time someone assumes that, I desperately want to tell them that I have a girlfriend that I love more than life itself. But by coming out, we could be sacrificing our careers. It is expressly forbidden for an assistant district attorney to date a detective she is working with." She sighed softly. "I don't have feelings for him baby."

"It's just so frustrating," Casey murmured as she laid her head on Olivia's chest. As Olivia responded by wrapping her arms around her, she closed her eyes and stayed quiet for a few moments. "I see how he looks at you. I see how most men look at you, and sometimes even women too! And when you stuck up for him in the way you did, it felt like a knife in my heart."

"Maybe, but there is one thing you always have to keep in mind. I only have eyes for my sexy kitten. They can look all they want, but you know what sweetheart? They can't touch…" Olivia smirked. "I know I have the body they want though."

Casey rolled her eyes and playfully elbowed Olivia in the ribs. Regaining her seriousness, she laid her head back down and yawned a little. Being in the arms of the one who made her feel loved, wanted, and protected always made her sleepy. She curled up more tightly and shook her head. "So what now?"

"Well, first thing's first. Forgiving each other, are we in agreement we will not let this or anything like this come between us EVER again?" Casey nodded sleepily. Olivia smiled and kissed the top of her head, running her fingers slowly through Casey's hair. "Well, beyond that, I have no idea. We can order pizza, or…" Olivia rolled over and pinned Casey underneath her. "Or we can do this!"

Casey laid her head on the couch, not even bothering to answer the question, because both of them knew the answer. She finally understood that analogy that stated what it was like to feel as if a giant weight had finally been lifted. That anvil crushing her heart throughout this fight was completely gone, and as Olivia began undressing her, all Casey knew was that she never wanted the special moment between them to end.


	11. Chapter 11

**Author's Note: Chapters will be from Casey's POV unless a certain chapter requires Olivia's viewpoint. I am now writing this story alone, but I am doing my best to update regularly. Reviews are greatly appreciated. I love you guys ****J**

Olivia took her time stripping Casey of everything she wore. A snail could have undone Casey's buttons faster than the rate the detective was doing it, and it was driving Casey crazy with need. She attempted to help Olivia once, but Olivia had used her own body to pin her firmly against the couch. Finally, Casey was laying naked on the couch and Olivia was undressing herself. "Olivia-" she tried to protest.

"Is that begging I hear?" Olivia, with a playful smirk, demanded as she pulled her own shirt off. She moved to the button on her pants, making Casey fight back a whimper.

"Not begging," Casey mumbled, knowing begging was exactly what Olivia wanted out of her.

Olivia pulled her pants off, followed by her panties. "We will see about that. By the end of tonight, you'll be lucky if you can even get out of bed tomorrow morning!"

"But we're on the couch," Casey pointed out. "How can I not get out of bed if we are not in bed?" As soon as Casey asked the question, Olivia chuckled to herself and led her into the bedroom. Her arguments never worked in bed. "What about the-" Casey's question was answered when Olivia left the room and returned seconds later with her work cuffs dangling from her finger.

"Anything else, Counselor?" Olivia growled quietly while she handcuffed Casey to the bedpost. Casey shook her head and relaxed against the pillows. Olivia kissed her passionately, pushing her tongue gently against Casey's. Casey pushed back as hard as she could, but Olivia's retaliation was even harder. She bit hard into Casey's bottom lip and then broke the kiss for a moment, making Casey look at her in confusion. "Do you have neighbors who will get angry if we're too loud?" Before Casey could respond, she grinned seductively, making Casey squirm and fight against the handcuffs. "If they complain, they complain," Olivia added. "I'll just nicely point out the freedom of speech right…or in this case, freedom of screaming." That being said, she slid down Casey's body and gently brushed her fingertips across Casey's skin, beginning on her neck and working her way to Casey's inner thighs. Seconds after her tongue reached between Casey's legs, she stopped.

"Olivia," Casey whimpered.

"Yes, that's my name." Olivia resumed brushing her fingertips across Casey's highly sensitive body.

Casey knew there was only one way to get what she needed from her girlfriend at the moment, but she had no idea how to say it. "Please?" she asked weakly.

"Please what, Casey? I know you want to beg me, and once you do I'm happy to oblige. I know you can do it. Please what?"

"Make love to me," Casey whimpered. Olivia leaned up, kissed her passionately once more, and slid back down to oblige her.


End file.
